Retirement Party

My brother has now retired from the city police department. He gave 30 years of time and service to protect and serve.

The family got together for dinner at one of our favorite BBQ restaurants to celebrate this bitter sweet time in his life.

Hes was one if the good guys. A gentle giant standing over 6 feet tall and over 200 lbs. If a criminal was put in the back of his police car, you can bet he was probably witnessed to rather than lectured. My brother had a soft heart yet strong hands and no one could get past him. He was pretty intimidating I would say.

He enjoyed working in the schools often and all the children loved him. I've seen him sit down to lunch with kids in the lunchroom and help them cross the roads before and after school. He was a hero to many. He didn't talk much about his adventures on the streets as he kept everything confidential. I was able to ride with him a couple times on a shift which I thought was exciting yet scary at times.

I can remember the first time he announced he made it on the police force. It was sorta hard to absorb at the time as I was only 16 and bit of a lead foot". "Does this mean I have to be careful?" "Will he be following me around?" "Oh no, he will have a gun". "People will be shooting at him". "He will be speeding!" Many things crossed my mind as I took it all in. Excitement, worry, and even envy as I was only a fast food worker.

It all turned out for the good as I was able to get out of a few tickets, he was the first on the scene when I'd have an accident (no counting), and I knew just who to call when something was going on around my neighborhood.

With the way the world is now, I'm glad he has gotten out. Times are getting hard for authorities now days and its only going to get worst.

He will continue volunteering a few hours a month to keep his credits but no more stopping in for Holiday dinners while adjusting the vest and belt to comfort as he gulped down a meal and no more rushing away from a conversation to get to a call.

I am proud of him and wish him the best as he ventures out the rest of his life.

Are We Ever Happy With Ourselves?

Are we ever really happy with ourselves?
I ask myself this question quite often as I continue to hear others complain about themselves. Weather they are skinny or fat, sick or healthy. I give an eye roll and say under my breath, "do something about it". I'm tired of hearing the complaining and pessimistic outlook on things.

But then wait....I'm the same way. I am guilty.
When I was over weight I complained that I was fat,
My clothes were too tight,
Muffin tops were more like cans of biscuits.
I covered up at the beach when I would walk past others.
I complained my jaws were fat,
nothing I wore looked good.
Pictures were pathetic
and I felt like a sack of potatoes in bed.

I finally did something to fix it.
I went on a diet.
I lost 45 lbs. I've gone from a size 12 to a size 4.
I'm all excited with my new size,
I couldn't wait to sport that bikini,
buy some tight jeans
and smile a little more without the chubby cheeks.

Now what?
I buy those jeans in a size 4 and they are too short.
I wore that bikini at the beach but what the heck is all that loose stuff rippling and swinging back there? I may need to cover that up now.
I wave at everyone with my new fitted t-shirt on, only to find that my bat wings were waving faster than my hand and I was afraid Id take off in flight if I didn't stop.
My boobs have almost disappeared so my shirt choices are minimal.
My knee bones hurt against each other when I sleep in fetal position.
Those chubby cheeks? They are wrinkles on my neck.

So you see. Can we ever be completely pleased with ourselves?
Can we stop looking at the negative things and focus on what really matters?

Even though my appearance will never please me 100 percent,
I feel better.
I can run and walk without pain.
I can now curl my legs up in the chair and still have chair left over.
I can shop in the junior department
and I can own bathing suits in more colors than just black.
I no longer suffer from heartburn,
My skin is healthier,
The heels on my feet are no longer smashed,
I have ankles now,
and no fat hanging over my jeans.
I can now roll over in bed without actually sitting up and turning.
My arms no longer fall asleep at night due to my weight putting pressure on them.
My grocery bill is smaller due to less junk food purchases
and I have more energy,
which puts me in a better mood.

So now
Just ask yourself, "Am I ever really happy with myself?"
Work on those feelings. Why are you not happy?
We are always going to find something wrong,
but we need to find the positive in the negative and own it!