Job Search

I want to talk about my job search. Many of you know I was let go from my office manager job in October, 2019. It has almost been a year now and I still have not been able to land a job. I’m frustrated. I feel let down, I feel bitterness from my past job. You see, I worked there for 26 years, I took pride in my work and gave it my best. I was the only female on the payroll. I felt important. I was dedicated. I was there every day unless I was on vacation in which I would still have to log in and work as no one else could keep it together. I even came in before and after family funerals. Then the day came when the Boss came in and told me he had sold half the business, assured me that I was his favorite employee (BS), gave the other employees a raise, said he can no longer afford to pay me and just like that, I was unemployed relying on a two week severance pay and 12 weeks of unemployment checks.

Fast forward to now. 

I am struggling to find work. I was making really good money for years and now I have to accept a job making less than half what I made before. I am willing to accept that. I can do it. I want to work. I have never been without a job since the day I turned 16. I am now 51. I am getting really sore sitting around the house all the time except for our couple of beach trips. We do not have the money to do home repairs, or take fun outings like I would like to do while I have all this time together. 

I am getting tired of people questioning why I haven't found a job yet. It’s quiet embarrassing too and I feel like hiding under a rock. 

Finding a job is like winning the lottery. Without any education or training, I get beat out of every position. No one will give me a chance. I have learned that to get a job, you have to personally know someone who is hiring. Now this pandemic has hit and it seems everyone is on a hiring freeze. I have visited my community college but I learned quickly that I can not afford it and can’t get financial help due to the amount of money I made last year. 

I have applied to at least 211 jobs and that does not count the many I applied for before I started keeping track. Out of those jobs I have gotten 5 live interviews and 2 phone interviews. That’s as far as I can get. I do not hear back from most and the others send an email denying me. I am turned down mostly due to not having the education, training or that I am not bilingual. 

I did land one job as a phlebotomist at a plasma center. I was so excited, but within one week, they lost my file with all my personal info, there was poor leadership, I saw a lot of unprofessional things and the clientele that came in to donate plasma were mostly the kind of people my daddy always warned me about. I found it best to quit and not waste any more of their time. I decided to let my phlebotomy certification expire and stick to office work. I can always renew it if I change my mind. I would still love to be a phlebotomist. 

Friends try to help me and give me advice but none that I have not already tried. Nick wants me to keep my job search kept within a 10 mile radius and that puts a burden on my search. He looks at the milage I would take to and from work, the wear and tear on my car and my over all safety. I refuse to work in a restaurant or grocery store. Those are both great jobs and I did both when I was younger but I want a job I will enjoy with regular day time hours. 

My last resort will be to check with a temp service but I am putting that off as long as I can. Nicks says we are ok on monies right now to survive but I am getting desperate to find work. I hope something will come along. I have been praying about it but sometimes I feel like God ain't listening. I have cried a lot and I feel like I’m loosing communication and social skills. I have days where I feel useless and worthless but as an optimist, I can usually pull myself out of the funk. If you pray, please keep me in your prayers that something will come along and I can get back into the working world. I need it.